I have tried to write this post the last few months, but I each time I write tears roll out my eyes. It is about a lesson that I learned the hard way.
A year ago when I just joined Twitter, I was very lucky to have many Twitter Elites as my mentors, and @imadnaffa was one of them. I felt really special because he had around 40,000 followers at that time. It was a big deal for a newbie who only had 40 followers. We would exchange DMs everyday and Skype once in a while. I still remember he was always too busy to go out for lunch and I would tease him with my yummy food. Imad was a hard working man with a great heart. Whoever says Twitter friends are not real are wrong. He was a big brother, a father, a teacher to me. We were looking forward to meet each other in real life at TEDxCanton. It was the good old days before I became Miss Popular.
In the beginning of this year, I became much more recognized by the Torontonian Social Media community. I was the face you would see at every event. Everything has its price. To be Miss Popular that everyone loves, I spent less and less time talking to the people in my life, and Imad was one of them. I was always too busy going to another exclusive launch party, building new relationships and ignored every Skype call from Imad. I was too busy responding mentions from stranger and ignored Imad’s DM. I was too busy being popular, and forgot my friend.
On Friday September 2, 2011, I sent Imad a message
“Hey buddy, we have not talked in a long time, We should catch up sometime next week”
Imad DMed me back and promised he will explain more about the meaning of “Twitter élite” to me soon via Skype. Sadly that Skype call never happened. On Tuesday September 6, the second-most influential construction industry tweeter passed away at the age of 49. I did not know what to say when I heard the news from Lonnie Hodge [@lonniehodge].
Now when I have no events to go, no people to impress; my friend is no longer here with me. It was too late.
I was too busy building relationships and influencing people and forgot about the people who were influencing me. Without @imadnaffa and all my beloved friends, there is no @cammipham today. Don’t make the same mistake.
It does not matter if you have 60 000 followers, if you no longer have anyone to share it with. Building relationship is important but nurturing relationship is more important. It is why you build relationship in the first place. It is like buying a cute pair of Jimmy Choo shoes and never wear them. There is no value if you just build something and forget about it. You cannot start a company, walk away and come back 5 years later expecting few hundreds million dollars. Same rule applies to the business of relationship.
Fame, power and wealth will fade. The only people will stay next to you when you have nothing is the people you invest in today.
Imad’s death changed me in many ways:
- I don’t go to every event I get invited anymore. Brands might need me but my family and friends need me more
- I put away my phone when I talk to people. My family and friends deserve my attention. Replying a mention late will not hurt anyone.
- I reach out and try to reconnect with people who are in my life
- …
Imad, I am sorry I was not a good friend. Thank you for all the lessons you taught me. I hope in heaven the angels are taking care of you. You know no matter where you are, you are always in my heart.
You can shed tears that he is gone,
or you can smile because he has lived.
You can close your eyes and pray that he’ll come back,
or you can open your eyes and see all he’s left.
Your heart can be empty because you can’t see him,
or you can be full of the love you shared.
You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.
You can remember him only that he is gone,
or you can cherish his memory and let it live on.
You can cry and close your mind,
be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what he’d want:
smile, open your eyes, love and go on
David Harkins – Revised Version
cammipham
@ArchiFacts I cry each time I see his name….he was a great guy
ArchiFacts
@cammipham He lives 4ever through u. We would never have known of his kindness if not 4u. At least u were aware and made changes n ur life.
cammipham
@ArchiFacts I was always running around, at that time I was working with a startup too and it was insane busy….i learn to balance my life
ArchiFacts
@cammipham You were chosen to learn that lesson because your ancestors wanted you to grow and enlighten others.
cammipham
@ArchiFacts :) thanks how are you doing…
ArchiFacts
@cammipham So many go through life being selfish & not paying attention to the lessons and wisdom that are before them. #AncestorsGuideUs
ArchiFacts
@cammipham You are most welcome. Doing great, just practicing patience and maintaining a devoted work ethic to the vision in mind #progress
cammipham
@ArchiFacts glad to hear that
ArchiFacts
@cammipham How are you? and thank you for being selfless enough to ask. =)
cammipham
@ArchiFacts :) i am doing great just a little bit busy
ArchiFacts
@cammipham busy is always good. #betterthanbored
ArchiFacts
@cammipham Good PM!
Van Thien Quoc Huy
It’s so sad. Nice lession!
CamMi Pham
Van Thien Quoc Huy anytime I see his name I cry…..after he passed away all his auto feed is still running…it was so hard for many people to believe he is not with us anymore
Swarn Singh
It is meaningful truth.
cammipham
@Mick_Gill thanks for sharing dear
cammipham
@pascalclaeys thanks for sharing dear
CamMi Pham
Swarn Singh thanks I am glad you enjoyed it
cammipham
@leaderswest thanks Jim how are you dear
cammipham
@JeffTitelius :) I am glad you like it it means a lot
cammipham
@SuuperG thank Gina for sharing
cammipham
@VeronicaBasye thanks for sharing Veronica :) hope you enjoyed it
VeronicaBasye
@cammipham Extremely heartfelt. Thank you for sharing.. :)
cammipham
@VeronicaBasye :) it sad but true….and i need to learn from my mistake
VeronicaBasye
@cammipham Life’s only reason for mistakes is to learn from them :)
cammipham
Life’s only reason for mistakes is to learn from them ~ @VeronicaBasye
cammipham
@VeronicaBasye :) agree
cammipham
@BCCF thanks for sharing :) you guys with @lotay right?
ZukoBlackwellOn
@BCCF Crazy I have blew over 4 hours at #twitter lol see your time http://t.co/u7yjLusQ
Pingback: Don’t Just Build Relationships, Nurture Them | cammipham | Web Biz Tutor | Scoop.it
Thomas2BHughes
@cammipham It takes time and effort with all relationships and it is hard not to forget aboout someone or a group. But its worth the effort
cammipham
@dixiebits thanks it was a good lesson. I spent to much time working and didnt pay much attention to ppl around me
Tim7088
@cammipham. That was a very touching story
cammipham
@Tim7088 thanks how are you tim
Tim7088
@cammipham Doing well Cammi. I see on your blog that you are trying to read 365 books in a year! Wow, that’s a lot. How is it going so far?
cammipham
@Tim7088 thanks
cammipham
@Britopian thanks brito :) how are you and the girls
Britopian
@cammipham I am doing well … And I know you ate too ;-)
a_bh_a
@cammipham Wow what a great post. Very sad but fundamentally important. Thanks
cammipham
@curvymodelP i am glad that you agree
cammipham
@ImBrandingU thanks
blacksebath
@cammipham So true.
The race is not for the swift but for (s)he who can endure.
DrSampyRoy
@rlalita. Thanks Lalita! :-))
clickflickca
@cammipham I did not read this post yet but many PR agencies/companies are not good at this. Just an FYI. Will read soon.
cammipham
@clickflickca yeah its all about fast marketing nothing long term
raybryant1234
Very nice post. Thank you for sharing
lil_tea
@cammipham Beautiful post. We often lose track of these important things in our busy daily lives. Glad you were able to take away from it.
cammipham
@lil_tea it happens all the time even we know it we still forget it
Ayoss
@cammipham I looooove your blooooog! #KeepUp
cammipham
@Ayoss which one :) i have 2 thanks it means a lot
cammipham
@Ayoss oh my personal one. i am glad you like it
Ayoss
@cammipham Yeah your personal blog! (My phone died on me last night) It is really inspiring & you keep it so simple! :)
cammipham
@Ayoss :) i am a fan of minimalist :) thanks agains how are you
Ayoss
@cammipham U succeed showing it beautifully! I am resting at home (Montreal) enjoying the last day of the week. And you? Hope you’re great!
cammipham
@Ayoss just blogging and spending time w my family. you might want to read the last blog post, its funny
Ayoss
@cammipham I am going on it right away, you might be interested by this http://t.co/eYieU628
cammipham
@Ayoss nice post however i hear you matter way too much lately…it starts getting abused
jedi_roach
@cammipham I could not agree more!
camo meets couture
This is so sad dear, I cannot begin to imagine what it must be like to go through. Truly something that stays with you forever. RIP.
xx
cammipham
@camo meets couture It is sad he was a very nice person. thanks love
cammipham
@hkj201 thanks for sharing it
Assuntinho
@cammipham Really wise
Pingback: Why I Never Attend Conference For ContentBlog of CamMi Pham